Strangers in a Coffee House

I noticed him before he came inside. The coffee shop is located on the corner of a busy intersection. It has large windows that allow patrons to see the comings and goings on the street as they relax over espressos and other assorted beverages. He was bundled in a Mexican blanket; he had a full beard of salt and pepper. His hair was straggly but didn't appear to be grimy. On his feet he wore sandals with socks that couldn't possibly have warded off the bitter cold in the air. He clearly wasn't a local and he gave off the distinct aura of someone who had nowhere specific to go. I watched him come into the coffee shop but stopped watching him as he approached the counter. I didn't want to stare, and I feared that my companion would notice that she did not have my undivided attention.

The next time I saw him he was taking residence at the table adjacent to ours. In his hand he carried an espresso mug. I marveled at the sight. Something about a man who appeared to be near destitute sipping an espresso instead of an old fashioned cup of Joe struck me as humorous. At the same time he sparked an interest in me. He carried no belongings save the worn blanket that appeared to have been colorful earlier in its life.

After a couple of minutes he politely interrupted our conversation and inquired as to where he may purchase tobacco. We directed him to the nearest location and he thanked us profusely. I watched as he attempted to engage others in polite banter only to be rewarded with indifferent shrugs and hurried, mumbled responses.

I was mesmerized by his presence even as he fell asleep; his chin tucked into his chest, his breathing slowed, and his face set with a placid expression. I couldn't help but wish I had my camera. I knew that I was missing out on an amazing photographic opportunity. The photo would have been incredible. At the same time, I was cognizant of a sadness he invoked in me. He was passing through town on his way from somewhere else, to who-knows where. He was clearly a man with a story.

When he awoke he once again thanked us for the directions, left the shop, and has haunted my memory ever since. This was months ago, but I still picture him sitting there, bundled in his blanket, enjoying the warmth, and resting for a spell.

Kerplunk

I was involved in an incident today which left my sister hysterically laughing in a bathroom stall. In order for everyone to understand the level of hysteria she reached, I must give you a little background story.

The Good Guy (henceforth to be referred to as '2x4' because typing 'The Good Guy' has gotten REALLY old) generally takes his cell phone into the bathroom with him when he showers. If you want to know why you'll have to ask him, I'm not sure. One morning whilst 2x4 was showering I had to use the facilities. As I passed the vanity my arm brushed his phone (which was precariously placed on the edge of the vanity closest to the toilet) and it fell into the toilet. The kerplunk sound was quickly followed by my emitting "CRAP!" and reaching in after it. As I pulled it out of the water its lights went off, and it never fully recuperated. I will never live this down. The cell phone/toilet incident has lived on in infamy.

Today my sister and I needed to use the facilities in the mall prior to shopping. I decided that today wasn't a hovering day so I grabbed one of those tissue paper seat cover things and was placing it on the seat when KERPLUNK! Before my eyes my sunglasses dislodged themselves from their resting place hooked to my shirt and fell INTO THE TOILET! AAAAARGH!

Ok, I'll admit that for a split second I considered going in after them. A microsecond. Then I just yelled a profanity and stared in shock at my sunglasses resting in the bottom of the stupid dirty public toilet. DAMN IT!

My sister (who was in the next stall over) was laughing so hard that she couldn't speak. She came out of her stall all red and gulping for air. She made several comments about how it wouldn't be nearly as funny if I hadn't been involved in the cell phone incident.

Whatever.

Then, more people came into the bathroom. We barely contained our laughter as we washed our hands while watching them do that thing where you open several stalls in order to determine which is the cleanest. Each person stopped with a quizzical look at the stall I had abandoned with the toilet seat tissue and sunglasses still in place.

So, I text messaged 2x4. I told him that I need new sunglasses because I dropped mine in the J.C.Penny's toilet.

His response: Loser. Stop dropping things in toilets.

I now must accept the fact that this is one of those stories that will haunt me forever, like the time I misspelled my own name.

50 More by Popular Demand

I got three votes (and one challenge) for the next fifty. Enjoy.

51. I think that urine and freshly popped popcorn smell curiously similar. Same goes for raw onions and body odor.
52. I am AWFUL with geography. I skipped that day.
53. I frequently borrow intellectual and informative books from the library then exchange them for chick-lit. Unread.
54. I have a hard time clipping my toe nails. I can't seem to find a comfortable position.
55. I think that if I had received training early in life I would have made a hell of a dancer.
56. I tried out for cheerleading once in high school. That shit's hard.
57. I didn't believe that I was beautiful until The Good Guy convinced me. Now I believe that I'm a Goddess.
58. I've done a great deal of research on Witchcraft. If I were ever to subscribe to a religion, that's the path I'd choose. Not Wicca, Witchcraft. Nature worship. The earth would be my church. I guess it already is.
59. I always feel inferior in academic circles.
60. My favorite movie of all time is 'The Philadelphia Story'.
61. I love Cary Grant. He was dreamy.
62. I wish men still dressed like they did in Frank Sinatra's day.
63. I'm over Brad Pitt. Angelina made him weird.
64. Angelina Jolie is sexy. No doubt about it.
65. The Good Guy loves to correct grammar (whether you ask him to or not). It used to piss. me. off. Now I look to him for proof-reading.
66. I've figured out why my parents made so many mistakes, this parenting stuff is tricky.
67. I could spend hours in a craft store.
68. Chocolate makes my clothes shrink. (I saw this on a sign today-made me laugh out loud in the middle of the store) It's true.
69. Baby shoes are some of the cutest things on earth. They're right up there with kittens and puppies.
70. I once saved a dog from choking on a Milkbone by smacking him really hard on the back of the head. It flew out of his mouth and he proceeded to continue eating.
71. I rock out to Sean Paul in my car when nobody is watching. I belt out muddled non-word grunts instead of the lyrics because I have NO idea what the hell he is saying.
72. I wish kids were more innocent and lived to play ball on the local field instead of playing the latest shoot 'em up video game.
73. I'm an emotional woman. Remember those damn AT&T commercials? I cried EVERY time.
74. I'd rather be emotional than numb.
75. In high school a classmate spread a rumor that J and I were lesbian lovers because we turned him in for cheating.
76. I was voted 'Most Opinionated' in my senior yearbook. I refused to accept the title so they changed it to 'Most Tenacious".
77. In high school, Most Opinionated =Biggest Bitch.
78. I have a hard time with poetry. Most of it is too ambiguos for my simple mind.
79. Someday I want a loft apartment downtown in a bustling city.
80. I very much enjoy the smell of lavender and lilacs.
81. If I had to pick my four favorite flowers they would be tulips, sunflowers, gerber daisies, and roses. OH! and hydrangeas!
82. I once snuck into a movie without paying. A good friend chastized me and I felt horribly guilty.
83. I think some newborn babies are ugly.
84. I have a tattoo. I'm not telling you where ;-)
85. 'Taming of the Shrew' is my favorite Shakespeare play.
86. My first dog was a Chow. When she almost bit my face my parents sent her to a farm. No really, that's what they told me! It has to be true.
87. Buffet=All you can eat germ infested food.
88. I never once in my life ate my boogers. Not once.
89. I think naming your child after yourself is vain. I'm sorry, but I do.
90. I almost died from carbon monoxide poisoning.
91. My dad once removed rust from my bicycle using Pepsi. I stopped drinking soda for years thereafter.
92. I am scared to DEATH of driving in NYC. No way would I do it. Montreal was bad enough. I think I ran three red lights.
93. I can't parallel park. The last time I did was during my driving test.
94. I am a horrible speller.
95. Oh my goodness! One of the kids just ripped a HUGE fart in their sleep! LOL!
96. Farts are funny.
97. I used to own a Dalmation who smiled. She was the best dog ever. I miss her.
98. I have SUPER pale skin. People feel the need to point this out to me. Thanks. I never noticed.
99. Aloe is great for a sunburn.
100. I am in love with the most incredible man in the whole world. He loves me back, just as much. I'm going to spend the rest of my life with him. I'm a hopeless romantic. I believe in happy ever after. I believe in soul mates. I've found mine.

There you have it folks! I hope you weren't too bored.

50 Things About Me

Ok, so I stole this idea from David who stole it from Thursday. It is also featured on Marty's blog. It's a shameless copy of someone else's idea, but it seemed like fun and I really want to be part of their club. They went with 100 but I'm not really that interesting. So, here you go, 50 pointless factoids about sheltered little ole me:

1. As a kid I was the finickiest eater in all the land. I wouldn't touch a vegetable. I lived on mayonnaise sandwiches, pb&j (grape jelly only) and hot dogs with the ends cut off (because they look like bellybuttons). My mom thinks it's hysterical that I'm now a health conscious vegetarian.
2. I have a tendency to ramble on and on.
3. I grew up in a house where I wasn't permitted to be loud. Children were to be seen and not heard. I now speak REALLY loudly if I'm not careful.
4. Chocolate is a food group in and of itself.
5. I enjoy the sound of horse hooves galloping and the sound gravel makes when tires drive accross it.
6. My dad's house, which I loved more than any home I've ever lived in, was razed many years ago to become a parking lot for a Moose Lodge. I've never driven by because I think I'd get too emotional.
7. I love dogs. I want a Weimereiner someday.
8. I didn't vote in a presidential election until a few years ago because I never felt informed enough to make such a huge decision.
9. Sometimes I think that the sound leaves make when blowing in the wind is the same sound rain makes when it falls on the roof.
10. I used books to escape my reality during childhood. I still do it to this day.
11. One of my guilty pleasures is Dirty Dancing (the movie!)
12. I've never actually danced dirty.
13. I smoked pot once. I got all paranoid and actually started to worry about Homeland Security-no joke. Won't ever touch the stuff again.
14. When I eat cooked eggs the whites and the yokes have to be mixed together. Otherwise they're just disgusting. And who the hell was the first person to smell a hard boiled egg and say mmmm...smells good lets EAT that!
15. I've hated churches since I first stepped foot into one. Even as a child I felt oppressed and wanted nothing more than to get the heck out of there A.S.A.P.
16. One of my biggest fears is getting fat.
17. Soy dogs aren't as bad as I thought.
18. I don't have any wisdom teeth. They were cut out of my head.
19. Red Wine Only.
20. I once puked the brussell sprouts that my mom was making me eat back onto my plate. She didn't make me eat them again. HA!
21. I became environmentally concsious when I took 8th grade Earth Science. From then on I became somewhat of a radical recycler.
22. I loved hiking when I was a kid. My dad bought me the coolest pair of pink hiking boots ever!
23. I used to love watching my grandparents get sloppy drunk on Saturday nights (Martini nights at their house).
24. I used to sneak into my sister's room at night because I was afraid the boogy man would get me, and I figured I'd use her as a sheild.
25. My family used to gather in the bathroom and wave goodbye to my sister's poo while she was potty training. Otherwise she wouldn't go.
26. I resented the fact that my sister broke my whole Black Beauty play set.
27. I once worked in a restaurant where I had to wear a t-shirt that said "Former Contortionist"
28. I have a black thumb. I kill plants.
29. One of my toes faces the wrong direction.
30. Sangria, guacamole, and chimichangas are all proof that Mexicans make damn fine cuisine.
31. I get sad every time I see road kill.
32. One Thanksgiving I drove my car into a ditch full of cow manure in order to avoid hitting a cat. That was fun.
33. One day I want people to look at me and think, "That's a classy lady."
34. I always have a problem with the word dearth. I think it means an overabundance.
35. The first movie I ever saw on a VCR was 'Ferris Beuller's Day Off'. My dad rented both the player and the movie.
36. I also saw 'Amadeus' on that player and was so scared I couldn't sleep. Check the opening scene. It's awful.
37. I used to watch 'Friends' all the time. I liked it. I thought it was funny. I refuse to be ashamed. Same goes for Will and Grace.
38. I could never choose a favorite song, artist, or book. I simply like too many to choose.
39. I love photographs. My apartment has pictures of friends and family all over the place.
40. My first camera was a Fisher Price camera with disposable flash cubes. Remember those?
41. I LOVE the smell of basil. If good pesto wasn't so expensive I'd eat it all the time.
42. Crossword puzzles are stupid.
43. I don't have cable television because I have no will power and would spend too large a portion of my life planted in front of the boob tube.
44. My dad used to call the television a boob tube. Cracked me up every time.
45. Eating ice cream makes my stomach hurt. That doesn't stop me.
46. I am my own worst critic, and I'm a control freak.
47. I procrastinate more than anyone I know.
48. Some guy in a grocery store parking lot once asked me if I would give him a $20 bill for 20 dollars in food stamps. He was holding a case of beer.
49. On my first day of work in a grocery store a guy came through my register with 2 cases of beer and an economy size box of condoms. He was gross. I seriously considered asking him what his plans were for the evening.
50. I was annoyed when my mom made me start wearing bras at 13 years of age.

There you go. If anyone has a burning desire to read 50 more factoids about me, let me know and I'll consider expanding my list to its intended length. If not, I totally understand. That's a lot of useless info.

Remember When?

Do you ever just want to bottle up a moment so that you can take it out later and enjoy it again?

Last night The Good Guy and I ventured out into the yard of apartment complex after dinner to take an evening walk. We conversed with some of the local kids who were patrolling for hornet nests and killing bees with a baseball bat. We talked to some young girls whose faces were covered in paint applied in elaborate butterfly patterns about their scooters and who has the best one. A neighbor blessed The Good Guy when he sneezed before informing him that it is hay-feaver season.

The weather was perfect. There was a comfortable breeze and the humidity was the lowest it had been for several days. The Black-eyed Susans were in full bloom all around the complex. We held hands as we strolled and enjoyed conversation on a variety of topics. The sun was setting and we paused for a while to watch the clouds morph and change their pink and gray hues as the sun sank lower and lower in the sky. As we watched the sky-line I could hear a woman inside of one of the apartments yelling to her daughter in Spanish. We joked about whether or not the heart-shaped cloud was placed in the sky just for us, we talked about the green flash, Venus' belt, evenings spent watching sunsets, mornings spent watching sun-rises, and considered the view of the sunset that other people were having at that very moment to the west of us.

It was peaceful, tranquil, and wonderful. We all know that time moves forward, and that you can't go back. I guess the next best thing is to write these moments down so that we can re-live them in memory.

Demons

We watched 'Walk the Line' the other night. If you haven't seen this movie, go out and rent it. It was excellent.

It got me to thinking. Books and movies frequently do that. I can't turn off the T.V. or close a book and be done; they stay fresh in my mind for days as I mull them over, chew on them, and try hard to make more sense of them. Mr. Cash had some serious demons. He was a man who was full to the brim with hurt. His hurt manifested itself in a variety of ways, some good, and some bad. He became an amazing song writer and performer. He also became a man his family couldn't depend on, who abused his body with drug and drink.

I find that the older I get, the more the world is comprised of gray areas. When I was in my early teenage years, and knew everything, there was a whole lot more black and white. The answers were crystal clear.

Now, not so much. I've tried to make it harder and harder for myself to make blanket judgments of others. I've tried to inundate myself with information and alternative view points that allow me to consider the other side of the story, or to see the human behind the awful actions.

I read a book a while back titled, 'Last Chance in Texas, The Redemption of Criminal Youth' by John Hubner. Read it. You can't possibly read this book without gaining a new perspective on teenage criminals.

I also watched 'The Woodsman'. Watch it. It doesn't make excuses for a man who molests little girls, but it makes it clear that the man struggles day in and day out. He's a human being who has a problem. But he's a human none-the-less.

I remember being in a class and having a debate about what society should do with child predators and murderers. I took the position that they are humans, and we should do everything we can to not cast them aside and forget about them. When I took this position, I did it primarily because everyone else simply seemed to be in a lynching state of mind. Everyone in the class was on the same page. I hated that. It just seemed like the easy route to thrust criminals into a cell, consider them demon spawn, and think about it no more. I felt like someone should offer up an alternative. So, unsure as to whether I believed what I was saying or not, I began defending criminals who had committed heinous acts. I was of course not defending the crime, but the human hidden somewhere behind the ugly. I found myself taking the position that it is human society's JOB to eke out whatever is left of a criminal's humanity. I think we should try to shine a light on the part of a person's soul that is not damaged. I'm not saying that an intact portion exists in every criminal, (since I'm not entirely sure) but I am saying we should try and find out if one is still thriving.

I guess the long and short of this whole deal is that I'm still unsure exactly where I stand. I've written and re-written this post several times, and am still unhappy with the result. The point I'm trying to make, I suppose, is that it's really easy to cast aspersions. It's not difficult to saddle someone who did a bad thing with the reputation that he or she is a bad person. I think it's a challenge to try and look beyond someone's actions (regardless of severity) and try to understand what is going on underneath the surface.

Does this post make any sense at all?! Sometimes articulation is not my specialty. Grrrr...