This and That

It's been a while since I last posted. I've been busy, and have had a difficult time determining the best subject matter for my next post. I think I'll incorporate a couple of experiences into an "I'm really lucky to be me" theme.

My best friend in the world (in addition to my sister and The Good Guy) is J. J and I met when I moved one town over from the small town and house where I had resided for the first thirteen years of my life. Though my new home and school district were approximately 15 minutes away from the former, it was like a different universe. I hated everything about the experience, and it took me several years to forgive my mother for this horrendous disruption during my already tumultuos adolescent years.

Through a series of impermanent friendships and acquaintances J and I became friends. We have different personalities, but we balance each other out very well. It's hard to describe a friendship and connection that has grown over (Oh my GOODNESS) approximately 15 years. We have been through a whole lot together and apart.

J's mom died of breast cancer when we were 15. I had only met her once or twice and she was already pretty sick by that time. To this day I regret not having spent more time with her, I wish I could share memories of her with J, as J has finally reached a point where she seems comfortable talking about the subject; it was impossible for her for many years.

Before J's mom died, J made some self destructive adolescent choices. I remember feeling like I was beating my head against a wall while I tried to make her stop doing these things that were causing her harm. But at that point we were both too young to realize that she needed more help than I could offer. She had spent several years watching her mom slowly die, and it affected her profoundly. But...through it all we remained loyal friends, and one hand cared for the other as we offered each other a shoulder to cry on, or someone with whom we could share a fantastic laugh.

The last couple of weeks have been a whirlwind. With my mom being in the hospital, the semester drawing to a close, and my ambition being at an all time low I have been in one heck of an emotional slump. I haven't had a whole lot of time to spend with anyone, J included.

There's something to be said for women's intuition, and for close emotional connections. I came home the other day to a basket of mums, a bakery bag containing a fresh baked brownie and a sugar cookie, and a card from the best girlfriend one could ever imagine having, telling me that I've made it through worse, and that this too shall pass.

J has her own version of chaos happening right now. She's juggling two kids, an ex-husband, a job, and a pending acceptance or denial into a rigorous and somewhat prestigious college program. Yet, she found the time to brighten my day. She's simply a wonderful friend, and I've asked her on numerous occassions, "What on earth would I do without you?"

I am currently doing an internship/independent study in a local in-patient psychiatric facility. I assist in running an art therapy group for adolescents. The length of stay in this hospital is generally pretty short-a couple of days to a couple weeks. Therefore I don't frequently see the same kids every time I attend. However, there is one girl who has been in every session I have attended and she continues to blow me away. I'll call her Sara. Sara has anorexia, and makes it obvious in the art therapy group that she is working her proverbial butt off to get healthy. Her art creations have been numerous, and her introspection rivals that of any fully functioning healthy adult I've ever known. I won't go into details because these sessions are very personal and private, and I owe the kids a very high level of discretion. Some of these kids really take huge risks by sharing what they do, and Sara is at the front of the pack.

Sara reminds me of J. She has a really tough battle ahead of her, but she is clearly strong enough to come out on the other side healthy and thriving. I don't mean to diminish the hurdles and bumps that Sara and J have run into, and will continue to experience on their journeys-there will be many.

I just mean that they both embody admirable traits. They both inspire me. They've both made me maintain my focus on what is important in life. I'm a lucky lady.